Pgh Lesbian Correspondents

While not the Ides of March, today is auspicious – marking one year since I returned to my home after 6+ months of homelessness.

This is an important milestone because I worked really hard to make it happen (with a lot of help, of course) and because almost no one thought it would. I was in a safe place as the house guest of my friends, I was even happy getting to spend so much time with my nephews. As the days rolled past, it felt like a new normal.

But it wasn’t. It wasn’t my bedroom, nor my bed or furniture. My things weren’t there – books, mementos, art. And my cats. I had no idea what was going on with them. Were they still at their home? Safe? Secure?

As I sit here with my coffee this morning, two cats are wrestling with each other over a toy while Muriel is sleeping on the cable box, occasionally turning the TV on or off accidentally. It is my mug, my things, my home. My life.

Last week, our Family Court judge agreed to schedule a hearing to determine if and how the length of a domestic partnership prior to marriage impacts the overall length of the marriage. This aspect of “gay divorce” has never been settled in Pennsylvania, nor most other states. We might change that.

If the Court of Common Pleas rules against us, we’ll appeal to the Superior Court – and that decision could be binding on every family court in Pennsylvania. We are also in the midst of discovery. There are too many legal possibilities to explain here.

But there are legal costs that I will need your help covering. Filing fees, expert witnesses, appraisals, and the time of my attorney and her team for starters. Depositions can cost up to $2k each. Filing an appeal to the Superior Court will be at least another $5,000.

At the same time, the federal case is also active. The defendants, Allegheny County and UPMC, have submitted motions to dismiss, we’ve responded. The federal magistrate issued a recommendation, and we responded. Now we wait for the judge to decide on those motions. Again, it could go a thousand ways.

So this is where I need to ask you to once again contribute to my cause.

With your help, I hired two law firms, one for each case and supported myself in getting home. My income source is SSDI – yes, the current object of Presidential wrath and havoc over ‘fraud.’ Fraud detectors definitely will hone in on people with disabilities – like me – and especially people with permanent disabilities – like me. So I have this uneasy concern that my income might be in jeopardy or at least require me to jump through the hoops guised as case reviews. I’m worried about Medicare, too.

I’m taking steps to conserve my financial resources to pay for the legal expenses, but that’s tough on $1500/month. I’ve accessed food pantries, that helps a bit. As a social worker, I’m quite familiar with poverty programs and resources. I do not know how much these cases will cost in the end. Both lawsuits could involve creating case law to support LGBTQ families and people with disabilities. It is not just me or my life on the line.

Would you consider donating $10 today (for March 10) to mark this important day? Or $3 for March? Or $12 for a year? Or whatever strikes your fancy.

Some people prefer to send money directly to my lawyer which can be arranged. Or you can use Venmo or Paypal @pghlesbian or Zelle or gift cards or groceries or casseroles or whatever works for you. One friend added me to their Uber family account so I can get around. Another catering friend brings me some meals every few weeks.

There’s a misconception by some that I’m “sitting on a pile of money” that’s already been raised. Nope. With that money, I hired two law firms and paid some of my survival expenses.

Please help me defend domestic partnerships. I’ll lay out that argument in another update.I’m grateful the court is willing to listen. In this hostile climate, we cannot afford to lose any of our rights and protections.

$10 for March 10. Thank you.

PS: everything I’ve shared here is public. you can access it on the relevant dockets.