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Today marks one year since my father, my Dad, died. He was 83 years old. I don’t know what to say, but it feels important to mark this day. Part of me wants to share anecdotes about him,the good memories and the funny stories. Another part of me wants to continue pointing out his traumas […]
Sunday, my youngest nephew, E, made his theatrical debute in Legally Blonde, JR. He played the villainous law professor. The evening show curtain opened at 6 PM. I had seated myself with his mom’s, turning off phone alerts. So it was only after the show that I found this text from him. 2 minutes after […]
It doesn’t hurt this year. Not in the way her absence from this world ricocheted through my mind and heart the past two years. I realize I write about with so much sadness. Let’s try something new this year. And whatever sadness I feel is mitigated by knowing she is safe. Hopefully, she’s safe in […]
February is coming around the bend quickly. I’m so determined to just not think about ‘those things’ happening this week that I keep pushing myself to find something, anything, anything at all to anticipate in February. Tears roll down my face, my face so intently clenched thinking of what could be good in February. It […]
I’ve been emotionally struggling recently, a combination of post-holiday ennui with a reflection on my current situation. Also, I miss my nephews. One reality I cannot avoid is that I am not self-sufficient. I haven’t had to think about myself as unit of independent sufficiency for 20+ years. Now I’m caught in the fallout of […]
In case you were wondering, my solo Christmas was actually fine. I had Xmas eve dinner with friends. Then I came home and settled in. I had a sweet roll for breakfast, then heated up my chicken dinner around 2. In between, I watched ‘Call the Midwife’ most of the day. I did take a […]
Came across an article about spending Thanksgiving and Christmas alone. I’m spending Christmas alone and struggling to find language. That Google search led me to the ‘solo life’ concept. Solos are people who prefer to live on their own. I’m unclear if this identity includes people who don’t consciously choose to live on their own. […]
This year, I will celebrate Christmas day alone. Like many other people do. So I’ve been determined to pick quality merry time in with my friends and on my own. I saw the PSO Holiday Pops, visited the Christmas Village and Belsnickel at Old Economy Village, spent time just doing typical lunches and what not. […]
Christmas is coming. Over the weekend, I realized that I am in for a lonely Christmas Day. I’ve had plenty of festive activities with friends, some that I hope will extend through the ‘winter break’ period up to New Years. Still to come is the Holiday Pops Christmas concert, a trip to I Made It! […]
Content Notes: sexual abuse, enablers, stigma I published an intense post earlier this week. It was planned with care. I wanted to make specific points about the impact of grooming and programming, not vomit my entire story. It is unclear if I’ll ever do that. Yep, it is that bad. I worked with my therapist […]
