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He was dealt a traumatic hand from Day One. He worked hard, sometimes multiple jobs. He rarely called off. He was in the mills for 50 years. He grew up in a mid-century modern world, raised by grandparents born circa 1885. Everyone had good intentions, but that didn’t really pan out in their poor life […]
Content Note: racism, transphobia, homophobia, harassment of children, police, legal case, fear I did a little research and started to get a sense of how these transphobic bigots operate, the playbook they use. These people are truly despicable. To answer your question, no, I don’t think people connect the dots. And that’s not a condemnation, […]
Today is Pride. We had plans to go with a friend to see the parade and walk around the festival. Then the thoughts crept into my mind. Last night, I was fretting about the hill we’d have to walk up from our car to the festival. What if I couldn’t climb the hill? What if […]
The 1950 Census has been made public and I recently found my 1942-born mother living with her parents and siblings in Munhall. She was seven at the time the census taker visited. It is the first official proof I have from her “permanent record” – she was a little girl living with her family, her […]
First, always, is Miguel. How did and Rebecca find their way back from Facebook to marriage? What’s up with his kids now? Why haven’t we really had conversations between this Latinx man of color and Randall around their experiences of racial injustice? Miguel was a Latinx man in Pittsburgh in the 70s and 80s. Being […]
Today, my friend John would be 56 years old. Even in whatever heaven for terrific people might look like, he is cringing about that. But in some sort of heaven is a certainty for John. No doubt. I don’t even really believe in heaven or maybe I do, a little. But I know that a […]
Growing up in emotional, financial, and physical chaos, I learned early on that my saying “no” was at worst, dangerous, and at best, ineffectual. I did not learn the social skills of setting healthy boundaries for myself because almost no one around me modeled that behavior. I grew up in a time when boundaries were […]
Last week, friends set up a meal train for us to help me with my struggle to eat. It has been a lovely resource and quite effective. Dinner is handled most nights giving Laura a bit of breathing room with all the home stuff she has to manage in addition to her job and all […]
It has been five and a half weeks since my mother died. The phrase “and I still haven’t’ really cried” keeps coming to my lips, as if there’s a certain moisture emission density that is necessary to be a proper mourner. But it is true that I have not cried a lot, more often oozing […]
When I was a teenager and young adult, I struggled with the simple concept that I was a woman. I wasn’t questioning my gender identity; I was questioning my validity. Anytime I had to say something like “I’m a woman” in any context, I was self-conscious and awkward and keenly aware that I felt ‘othered.” […]
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