From Berks County comes word of a Pennsylvania lesbian couple stuck in legal limbo.  They married in Massachusetts, but to obtain a Massachusetts divorce will need to reside there for one year.  To get divorced in Pennsylvania, their marriage has to be legal in Pennsylvania which it is not.  Thus, their divorce petition was turned down.

Berks County is in Southeastern Pennsylvania

This is certainly not the first report of a same sex couple caught in a legal limbo due to the patchwork quilt of marriage equality laws in the United States and they certainly aren't the only couple in Pennsylvania who face this dilemna.  Faced with the dissolution of marriage, it is unreasonable to expect someone to move to Mass just to obtain a divorce.

Pennsylvania has just recently squelched attemps to amend the PA constitution to restrict marriage to one man, one woman.  Another bill is sitting in the Senate which would legalize same sex marriage. That's not going to happen, but I'd certainly like to see elected leaders such as Pennsylvania Senator Daylin Leach tackle the thorny issue of the divorce.  Forcing people to remain in legal limbo is not acceptable.  It is bad enough to have your marriage semi-acknowledged when YOU acknowledge it.  Being "sort of married" when you aren't with your spouse any longer is a real problem. 

We need real solutions.  Clearly, marriage equality is the ultimate solution which allows people to make their marital decisions without legal maneuvers and political power plays.  But is there something else that can be done?   A Rhode Island court denied a petition for divorce even without the DOMA law Pennsylvania has in place. A New York court, however, granted a divorce because children were involved.  This can be a very sticky wicket that requires thoughtful solutions as the full impact of second-class citizenship continues to fall out throughout the nation.

I say the solution in the short term is for us to work to elect allies who will show leadership on LGBTQ issues and tackle this sure to be growing legal problem for Pennsylvania families.

A marriage amendment has sprung up again in Pennsylvania. Its any easy way to pander to the right-wing conservatives who seem to populate this state. As has been practiced throughout history, fear is always a great way for a politician to get points with the constituents. I have been reading a great book about the rise of Richard Nixon and Ronald Reagan, two politicians who figured out how to use fear, and it's twin sister, ignorance, to win elections.

And here we go again, because it's not like we don't have real pressing issues in Pennsylvania that affect married heterosexual couples such as health insurance, poverty, hunger, crime--the list goes on. Discrimination against lesbian/gay/bisexual/transgender people is one of the last battles to be won in civil rights. It's still around because it wins elections and builds political careers -- see Metcalfe, Daryl --on the basis that if the LGBT community is permitted to marry it will destroy the fabric of the great Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.

This is repeated along with the obligatory biblical references without any evidence that any LGBT person's relationship and marriage has destroyed anyone's heterosexual marriage. In fact, every marriage that has been destroyed--particularly those of said right-wing fear mongering politicians has been done in by infidelity via a heterosexual partner such as a soulmate in Argentina or the sterotypical hooker.   

Other people have blogged eloquently today about our relationships and our families and that's important. But we in the LGBT community have to take a page from other civil rights movements and become politically involved even if it's no more than taking five minutes to vote. I have heard a lot of people in our community tell me that they are not political but, unfortunatley, that's just not an option. The politicans out there don't want to focus on the real, hard issues pressing this state. They want to focus on YOU and keep us from enjoying the same rights and benefits of society that they enjoy. So take some time and tell them we are human beings as worthy of rights as they (and their mistresses are).   

I don't think there's much I can add on the "Marriage Protection" amendment that I haven't covered in the past 4+ years. You have the contact information.  We need you to call today. Today is the day.

Sunday, I woke up at 7:30 AM, let out the dogs, put on the coffee and grabbed the newspaper.  We got ready for our day in our very mundane ways ... showers, searches for matching socks, feedings of various pets, etc.  We had breakfast. 

We went to the grocery store. Nothing says weekend chore like Giant Eagle on a Sunday afternoon.  We fuss over how to load the groceries and who gets to push the cart.  We haggle over items that aren't on the list.  We have a check-out routine and determine whose turn it is to get the fuelperks.  We lug the groceries to the car and drive home.

Unload. I put things away while she clears space in the fridge. One of us runs the disposal while the other takes the trash outside. Someone tosses in a load of laundry. Litter boxes get scooped.  Laundry is changed. The dog bedding is examined for contraband cat toys. 

Dinner is started.  We chat back and forth.  The Siamese cat changes hands repeatedly to prevent disaster. More laundry.  Final round of trash to the curb. Dinner. Dishes. More animal feedings. 

Oh, we folded towels, too.  And we read the newspaper and watched 60 Minutes. 

Why can't we just have our domestic little life and not be demonized and dehumanized by the Pennsylvania Constitution?  Is that really so much to ask?  

I wonder how many fuelperks it would take to earn civil rights?

Reminder to log in tomorrow to see what the blogosphere has to say about the PA "Marriage Amendment." I do not know how many blogs are participating, but I hope we can count on your support.  Please consider updating your Facebook status or Twitter status and it would be great if you change your Facebook and/or Twitter profile pic to use our image on Monday. 

Need some motivation? Darryl Metcalfe is running for Lt. Governor.

I'm still mulling over my post. 

Here's the logo.

I don't often pull over in the middle of the work day to make a phone call, but today was an exception.  When I received an email about a potential vote on the so-called "Marriage Protection" amendment, I dialed fellow blogger Maria Lupinacci of 2 Political Junkies and asked her to help me organize a blog swarm on the topic.  Within minutes, she agreed and a few hours later, had a logo in my inbox.  See earlier post for that! 

We have a chance to "make some history" folks, according to the ACLU.  Twice this amendment has come up in the Senate and both times it was defeated by procedural maneuvers.  It has never been simply voted down. 

This year, we have a chance to get that vote down once and for all so the Senate can focus on the business of governing this Commonwealth instead of monitoring my family like we are terrorists.  Remember that 100+ day delay with last year's budget?  Should we really waste a precious moment of the months leading up to budget negotiations on an issue that has already been legislatively addressed by the Pennsylvania DOMA? 

Here's what you can do.

This is a list of the Pennsylvania Senate Judiciary Committee.  Maybe you recognize a name or two?

Who to call.  Call the Harrisburg office (use your cell phone). Email messages are not going to work on this one. 

Mary Jo White  (717) 787-9684 Butler (part), Clarion, Erie (part), Forest, Venango and Warren (part) Counties

** Special note that Senator White has spoken against this amendment in the past.  Please thank her for that and ask her to vote no. This is a vote that can make an impact **

Jane Earll  (717) 787-8927  Erie (part) County

Jane Orie  (717) 787-6538  Allegheny (part) and Butler (part) Counties 

Our friends who always appreciate a thank you

Jay Costa (717) 787-7683 Allegheny County

Wayne Fontana (717) 787-5300  Allegheny County

This is quite important.  Many of the folks in this committee use Facebook, Twitter and so forth.  I have a list here. Use social media to spread the word to your friends, family and contacts. Update your FB status.

We have an unprecedented 5 day (including the weekend) window to make contact with these Senators.  I know you know gay folks and allies up in Jane Orie's district.  Don't write her off.  Let her know you are paying attention.  Never underestimate yourself. 

This is now a sticky post to remain at the top of the blog until Blog for Equality Day is Over. Read below for more current posts

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Back in 2008, 14 Pittsburgh blogs participated in our first Blog for Equality event to speak out against the attempt by the Pennsylvania Senate to amend our constitution to define marriage as between a man and a woman, the so-called "Marriage Protection" Amendment.  The "blog swarm" as it is sometimes described was successful, albeit not singlehandedly responsible for the failure of that legislation to make it out of committee. 

Still, you might like to revist what the 14 bloggers had to say in 2008.

Fast forward two years.  The Senate is once again discussing this issue and we anticipate a vote in the Judiciary Committee on Tuesday, March 16, 2010.  More details from the ACLU of PA:

The Senate Judiciary Committee is scheduled to vote on Senate Bill 707 next Tuesday, March 16, at 11:30am.  As you know, SB 707 is the latest incarnation of a state constitutional amendment to ban same sex marriage.

 

Like many controversial, close votes, this could go either way.

 

It's not hyperbole to say that we have a chance to make history.  We have never won an up-or-down vote on the marriage amendment.  We've beaten this in the past by winning procedural maneuvers.  But now we have that chance.  Let's make the most of it.

So I am announcing Blog for Equality Pittsburgh 2010.  I ask my comrade bloggers throughout the region (and the Commonwealth) to dedicate one post on Monday, March 15, 2010 to the topic of this amendment. 

We have an official Blog for Equality Pittsburgh 2010 button for you to add to your post (h/t 2pj Maria)

html is:

<p><a href="http://www.pghlesbian.com/blog/_archives/2010/3/11/4477944.html"><img src=" http://www.pghlesbian.com/B4E2010.jpg" /></a><p>

If you'll send me a link, I'll update this page with a permanent archive of bloggers speaking out against embedding discrimination into our Constitution.  The swarm is open to any and all bloggers so please spread the word.  You don't have to be gay to disapprove of discrimination and you certainly don't have to have a politial blog to participate in a day of action. We have an unprecedented opportunity to vote NO on discrimination and allow the State Senate to move forward on the critical issues all of our families face.

More later on how you can help make sure this amendment is not voted out of committee. 

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Participating blogs

Pittsburgh Lesbian Correspondents - Sue

Pittsburgh Lesbian Correspondents - Ledcat

2 Mums and a Boy

A Spork in the Drawer

Lucy & Ethel Have a Baby

Adam and Steve

2 Political Junkies - Maria

2 Political Junkies - David

Infinonymous

Jason Cable's GLBT Podcast and Blog

Froth Slosh B'Gosh

The Pennsylvania Progressive

Ms. Mon's Salon

No Longer the World's Slowest Blog

DealSnob

JaySays.com

Pgh Is a City

after the bridge

NGBlog

The Narrative in the Blog

Cognitive Dissonance in Pittsburgh and Beyond

Amadi Talks

The Angry Drunk Bureaucrat

The Dallas Voice is covering the vote.

Keystone Progress is on top of the issue.

Philly.com weighs in on the impending vote.

The Lehigh Valley Independent weighs in with their local angle.

Info from Change.Org on Gay Rights

And MyGov365.com which is still in beta is gathering feedback on the bill to pass along. I've been a beta tester and they were responsive enough to modify LGBT information already.

We have a shout out from Pam's House Blend via twitter ....

Local blogger Thomas Waters has been writing about this topic all month and has this post up with general information on the legislation.

On the other hand ... The National Organization for Marriage has a post up, too. 

From the Washington Post comes the touching love story of the first same sex couple to apply for a marriage license in DC.  They wed today.

"This is for everyone who wants to get married," she says. She used to run a support group for black LGBT women and would end sessions by inviting everyone to submit questions for the group to talk about. One day she unfolded a slip of paper that read, "I feel like committing suicide, but I'm scared." To this day, whenever Young is out, she looks for the writer of that note. She has never seen her.

"I am doing this because I love my partner and we deserve to be married," Young says. "But I am also doing this because the first one is always the hardest."

Someone has to pave the way. She still may run into that woman, and if she does she wants to be able say, "Now, sweetheart. Now you can come through the door."

sdf

Now is the time, according to Thomas C. Waters, for you to have a significant impact on the attempt to move the "Marriage Protection" amendment out of the Senate Judiciary Committee. Check out his blog for details.

Two quick side notes of interest.

Senator Barry Stout's seat is up for grabs as he retires.  Stout voted to move the marriage amendment out of committee in 2008.  One strong contender for the seat is House Rep Tim Solobay who was one of a very few Western PA Democrats to vote AGAINST a similar amendment in 2006 (the House did not vote on this issue in 2008). I have a list of his district so now is also a chance to identify and elect an ally to reclaim a Senate seat from those who believe we should add discrimination to the PA Constitution.

One of cosponsors of this bill is a Western PA Democrat, Senator Kasunic from the Fayette/Westmoreland/Washington county area. Now is a good time to follow the link to see if you have friends or family in that neck of the woods.  Now is a good time to make those real time phone calls (as opposed to email) so he knows what his constituents think about him being front and center in promoting discrimination.

Great piece from Sally on the need for good laws to help families of all types step up when crisis happens.

sdf

It is exhilerating that we could drive a mere 4 hours and get married, even if it would not be recognized in Pennsylvania. 

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/03/02/AR2010030203351.html

Congratulation to our advocates, allies and resident of Washington, DC on a truly historic day. 

ps:  today is the first day that same sex couples can apply for marriage licenses.