Ledcat and I have been exploring finding someone to clean our home a few times a month.  Shouldn't be so hard, right?

Wrong. It has become a nightmare.

I started by identifying what we preferred -- an established company with insurance, a pet friendly person, green cleaning (if possible) and some flexibility so we can be home when they come.  Reasonable?

I asked for referrals and had very few responses.  Those that did come in were very strict and unable to accomodate our schedule (I can't come home from work at 1 PM, sorry, and I have two escape artists so I don't want someone to be responsible for a runaway pet). 

Then I went to Craig's List and that's where the fun began.  My dear lord, the responses indicate ... well, simply put, that people don't read very well.  Not sure if they can't or they don't, but the end result is a big waste of my time.

1.  The woman who works for nuns and wants to clean on the side.  No insurance but she assured me that the nuns could verify she was honest.  That worked out real well for the kids in my childhood parish.  Huh.

2.  The woman who works for the County and assured me she has medical insurance.  Huh. 

3.  The man who can only be paid under the table and needs me to provide cleaners because he's coming straight from his other job and won't have time to go to the store.  Huh.

4.  The "Clean Freaks" company who required me to complete a web form, twice, and then chastised me for never receiving their estimate.  Huh. (I guess clean freak doesn't translate into customer service freak, eh?)

5.  The men who wants to start a cleaning company sometime and needs practice.  Huh.

6.  The company called "Steel City Cleaners" who wanted to schedule an estimate, but then revealed they are actually based in Florida and won't have PA insurance until later in the summer.  HUH? 

7.  The company with no name, two people sharing an email address who don't communicate with each other and an unwillingness to provide references.  Welcome to my home.  Right. 

That's just what I can remember. 

What an experience.  I don't want to use a national chain because they receive very poor reviews for cleaning and their treatment of their employees.  I don't want to pay under the table because that's been a disaster in the past.  I just want to do things aboveboard so taxes are paid, accountability is assured and everyone is protected.

Good grief. 

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Update:  Someone just threatened me with libel (yawn) because I allegedly inaccurately described their relocation plans.  They changed their website content after this post went up.  Do they really think there is no timestamp on that or that it isn't something that could be verified in legal proceedings?  Do people really think that sort of thing?  Police track murderes through the Internet! 

But, of course, I'm "bitter" b/c I don't like when people waste my time.  Well, I may be bitter but I'm also free to share my experiences on my blog.  That's why God invented customer service training.