It does get better. You approach your 40th birthday and embrace the gifts of maturity.  My partner and I are living the life, so to speak.  We have good jobs where we can be ourselves for the most part.  We have built a home together filled with a lot of real moments, including moments that have been sad and dark and devastating.  But we have each other.  Life is not perfect, but it is better.  Our parents realized they loved us more than they believed their prejudices.  They don't talk about us being gay, but they are part of our lives and it really is okay.  And for those who don't ... you fill your life with others.  You embrace your friends and appreciate the many ways they support and lift you up. 

I'm a firm believer that sometimes you just need to close your eyes and believe it will get better.  It always has, in some small incremental way. It isn't easy, painless or glamorous, but it is about believing in ourselves in some small way.

My favorite moment of each day is when I get up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom.  I come back to bed and Ledcat is asleep.  I always - ALWAYS - stop and think of how lucky I am to snuggle back into bed with someone who loves me with all of her heart and soul.  That soothes me right back to sleep.  It is the most precious  moment of the day for me and I truly know that it will continue to get better. 

The darkness is real, I know. But there is light and there is hope and there is so much love to surround each of us. Sometimes, you need to let that lift you up and carry you through.  Until it gets better for you.

Step back, naysayers.  It appears we have a race.  According to poll data released today, Sestak LEADS the race, 46-45. 

You can put Pennsylvania Senate back in the toss up category. Joe Sestak leads Pat Toomey 46-45 in our newest poll of the race, erasing the 9 point deficit he had in an August PPP survey.

Toomey's support has remained stagnant over the last 2 months while Sestak's has gone up 10 points from 36% to 46%. There are three main factors driving the increased competitiveness of the race:

-Democratic voters are getting more engaged as election day moves closer. Barack Obama won Pennsylvania by 10 points in 2008 but our August survey in the state found those planning to vote in November had actually supported John McCain by a point in 2008, suggesting a massive drop off in Democratic turnout. Now those saying they will vote next month supported Obama by 4 points in 2008. The enthusiasm gap is still there but it's not as severe a problem for Democrats as it was 2 months ago.

-Sestak has wiped out what was an enormous deficit with independents. In August Toomey led 50-27 with them. He hasn't really lost any support with them but Sestak has picked up most of the undecided ones and now trails only 49-48 with that voter group. Most Democratic candidates across the country are down double digits with independents so for Sestak to be running even with them is a good sign for him.

-The Democratic base is unifying more around Sestak. In August there was a considerable party unity gap in this race with Toomey winning 74% of Republicans while Sestak was getting only 64% of Democrats. Toomey is still benefiting from greater unity with his party's voters, getting 82% of Republicans, but Sestak is up to 77% of Democrats. While it persists that unity gap is half the size of what it was in August.